Under the AI Influence
It’s easy to picture the influence parents have on the friends their children make in person—whether at school or through sports. Parents can meet the other kids, get to know their families, and learn about their personalities. But what happens when your child creates a friend online? How can you vet that friendship, especially if it's with a bot or an AI? How do you ensure your child is forming healthy connections in a space where you can’t always see who they’re interacting with or where their "friend" might be coming from?
AI now offers more than just tools and entertainment—it’s also shaping how children socialize and learn about the world. AI-driven virtual assistants, chatbots, and even AI companions are becoming more common.
But they can’t replace the human interactions that are essential for healthy emotional and social development.
The digital landscape offers exciting learning and entertainment opportunities, but it also introduces new challenges. As artificial intelligence (AI) becomes an increasingly integral part of our lives, parents must remain vigilant about guiding their children’s online activities. From screen time limits to monitoring AI-powered apps, the digital world is evolving rapidly, and staying informed is key.
Human relationships are rich and multi-dimensional, requiring empathy, understanding of body language, tone, and non-verbal cues—things AI simply cannot replicate. Children who depend too much on AI for social interaction may miss out on developing crucial social skills that are necessary for forming healthy, real-world relationships.
The stakes are high. Children and teens are at a critical stage in their emotional and social development. As Erik Erikson’s stages of psychosocial development suggest, children ages 6–12 are in the "industry versus inferiority" stage, where they are developing a sense of competency through interactions and skills. Teenagers, ages 12–18, are in the "identity versus role confusion" stage, exploring their sense of self, values, and how they fit into the world. These stages are foundational for shaping a child’s identity and sense of self-worth (Erikson, 1950).
Where does AI fit into these stages? When children and teens turn to AI for conversations, approval, or feedback, it can distort their sense of competency and self-worth. AI's limited interaction can create a silo of feedback, weakening their intrinsic motivation and making them more reliant on digital validation. This dependency can also skew their moral compass, as online content—especially from AI— might influence their decisionmaking in unhealthy ways. Additionally, their understanding of relationships can become distorted, as they may confuse AI interactions with real human connection, leading to more isolation in the real world.
So what can parents do?
Some argue that technology is so embedded in our daily lives that it’s impossible to avoid, but it’s important to remember that children are still in their formative years and need guidance on how to navigate these spaces responsibly.
Open communication
The most important thing is open communication about technology. Parents should be clear about why certain boundaries are in place—such as limits on screen time or restrictions on certain content. Instead of making rules seem arbitrary, explain that there’s a balance between the online world and the real world, and that both are important for their sense of self-worth and overall well-being.
Clear boundaries
Once the reasoning behind boundaries is understood, it’s time to set and enforce them. Tools like time limits, parental controls, or content filters can be helpful, but it’s equally important to encourage offline activities that foster real-world skills. Whether through team sports, art projects, or other collaborative tasks, these experiences help children build resilience, learn from mistakes, and strengthen their sense of identity in ways that digital interactions cannot.
Critical thinking & digital literacy
It’s also essential to teach critical thinking when it comes to online activities. Help children and teens understand the potential benefits and pitfalls of AI, and how to distinguish between healthy and unhealthy interactions with technology. This includes educating them about data privacy, the risks of engaging with strangers online, and how to spot unsafe interactions with chatbots or other AI systems. By setting clear boundaries, explaining the rationale behind them, and empowering children to make informed decisions, parents can guide their kids toward healthier digital habits.
The digital world presents a vast amount of opportunities for learning, but also introduces new challenges for parents to navigate. As AI continues to evolve and becomes more integrated into our daily lives, it's essential for parents to remain engaged in their children's online experiences. By maintaining open communication, setting clear boundaries, and promoting critical thinking, parents can help their children develop healthy relationships both online and offline. A balanced approach to digital engagement will ultimately equip children with the emotional intelligence and social skills necessary to thrive in both the virtual and real worlds.
